RNSG The Masters at Heacham Manor

The Masters at Heacham Manor

With the weather forecast predicting temperatures near freezing and gale force winds it was obviously the start of the 2021 Round Norfolk Summer Golf tour. As tradition dictates the tour always starts at the same time as the Masters in Augusta. The main differences between the two tournaments is that they don’t have half the field pull out the day before, as it might be a bit cold and windy, plus the potential quality of the golf. As it happened the RNSG Masters was played under sunny clear blue skies, although it was rather windy and the golf was once again probably not up to Augusta standards..

Turned out to be a lovely day at Heacham Manor

With the field cut to 5 everyone was in with a good chance of a prize and the opportunity to make early progress up the money list. Especially as a major offers double prize money, which has been increased from previous summer tours. There was also the chance to make it onto the virtual honours board as a major winner.

With the WHS now in operation and without either of the tours handicap experts available no one was really sure what handicaps people should play off but using a combination of shoe size, age and day of the week we came up with numbers acceptable to all.

So it was all to play for as the groupings were sorted out, using a covid secure balls in the air government approved method, before Robert got the tour underway.

Robert gets the 2021 season underway

Robert was playing with Jo and Kevin. The Barnards have played here on many occasions so were offering Kevin dubious course advice leading to the lose of his ball on the second hole as he stumbled to 5 points in the first 5 holes. From there his game picked up with 14 at the turn.

Kevin was mighty relieved to clear the water on his way to his first par of the day

Robert was going along nicely showing his skill at keeping the ball under the wind, at least that's why he said he kept hitting it along the ground. Three early pars had him on 18 at the turn. 

Jo and Robert couldn't be separated, score wise, throughout the day and even hit the wrong fairways together

However he was surprised that Jo was beating him with 19 points after a very impressive opening 9 with the only blemish of a blob on the 4th.

Jo on the way to her only blob of the day after going in the pond at the 4th

In the group behind it was an erratic affair with blobs and pars flying in in equal measures. Vince, however stole a march on Chris with a 4 for 4 on the 9th to have 16 points to Chris’s 12 after 9.

Chris in action during an up and down day

The back 9 followed a similar pattern as Chris secured another 13 to Vince’s 11. This left the pair in 4th and 5th overall with the action for the prizes in the group ahead. They did report that they had explored many of the less visited parts of the course so felt they had had their money's worth.

Vince with one of his better lies today

Despite being only a week out of lockdown the course was empty with no other golfers spotted so the players could relax and focus on the Barnards going head to head.

Kevin started the back 9 strongly with 3 opening pars but as soon as Robert used mind games  and pointed out he was back in contention he knew his race was run as he blobbed the next two holes. He recovered to finish strongly but his final total of 31 points was never going to be enough.

Kevin is relived his approach shot didn't go in the pond at the 12th

With a par on 14 Robert had pulled into a one point lead over Jo who didn’t get shots on two of the last 4 holes. The Masters was his to lose and he would have to have a complete meltdown not to win. And what a meltdown it was as he spent the last 4 holes in long rough, water or recovering from poor drives. He managed only two points to finish on 32.

Despite Jo trying to put Robert off he sunk his putt as he built up towards his meltdown

Jo only needed 4 points over the last 4 holes to win but she too started to run out of steam as she finally started to struggle in the tricky conditions. A scrambled 7 on the last put her one point ahead of Robert and victory was secured when his long putt lipped out the hole for a closing blob.

Jo was crowned this years Masters winner

So Jo was the 2021 Masters champion, yet another new winner of the title and early leader on the money list.

The next RNSG fixture isn’t now until early May when hopefully it will be a bit warmer but before then the postponed last round of the 2019-20 winter tour will be taking place at Mundesley where it is still all to play for if you can remember that far back.

 Autumn Tour Round 5 at Hunstanton

The end of the RNSG Autumn Tour is nearing its climax and, with different winners from the first four events, the much-coveted title of 2020 Champion is there for almost all the tour members.

However, despite this, only a field of seven had entered the usually popular Hunstanton event, This was reduced on the morning to just six when Kevin had to withdraw due to ongoing effects from long-tail Covid; as we know with Kevin, this was not an easy decision but certainly the right one.

And so, on a reasonably mild, sunny but breezy day, two 3-balls were left to fight for the available 5 daily prizes, asking who would be the one left penniless? The players would find the course in brilliant condition but, with the wind, fast greens, numerous bunkers and some thick rough, it proved to be a challenge for everyone. With the incoming WHS rules coming in before the final event at Sheringham, this would be the last time that the FSS would need to be calculated, and the men were relieved that the ladies would only receive one additional shot.

Relieved men that they wouldn't have to worry about FSS again

The ladies went out first, with Jill, Jo and Chris all appreciating the proximity of the sea by wearing their lifejackets again, just in case! Each of them hit impressive opening drives and Jo made the early running with two opening pars, immediately improving her leading eclectic score on both.

Jo's excellent opening drive

 All three were steady through the front nine, with only two blobs between them, but points were hard to come by and the only 3-pointers came at the 2^nd hole for Jill and Jo. It was Chris, however, who proved to be the steadier, finding the speed of the greens sooner than anyone else, and lead the group with 16 points at the turn thanks to seven 2’s and just two 1’s, with Jo and Jill back on 13 and 12 respectively.

Chris was had a blob free front 9

The men followed and as is often the case, were more erratic. Robert and Andrew found bunkers on the first, though Robert did recover for a bogey and 2 points. Andrew failed to score and Vince, from the middle of the fairway, pulled his ball left and never saw it again. Robert played well, not surprising on the course at which he is a member and, despite some off-the-tee issues, scored a respectable 14 points.

Robert gets underway

Vince had a slow start but, in classic style, got on a run from the 6^th hole. An excellent putt for a 2-point double bogey, a brilliant tee shot on the par-3 7^th for a 3-point par, and a textbook 4-point par on the 8^th helped him to 12 points at the turn. 

Vince on way to opening blob

Andrew was inconsistent on and around the greens but had the three par-5’s to thank, with 3-point pars on each, helping to 15 points and 2^nd place overall.

Andrew also on the way to an opening blob

All players were pleased by the appearance of Kevin who, despite knowing all the scores at the turn, ignored the temptation to share. His observation of how players were struggling with the conditions only helped to confirm his decision to not play was the right one. The ladies, by now, were well into the back nine appearing (from afar) not to be struggling as much as the men and opening up quite a distance between the two groups - yardage wise that is, not points! In truth, they were also struggling to build on reasonable starts. On the 10^th hole, Jo failed to score. With less than a foot to putt out for 2-points, she failed to read the break and then did the same for the 1-pointer coming back! Only the difficult 200-plus yards par-3 14^th hole gave the ladies some 3-point opportunities, Jo taking hers with a par and Jill getting the field’s only birdie of the day. Jo struggled and, with two more blobs, could only score 9 points on the homeward nine for a total of 22.

Jo only managed a point a hole on the way in

Jill kept any more blobs off her card until the last, but with six 1-pointers, scored just 11 and 23 in total. Chris fought on valiantly but could not find a 3-pointer all day. Unfortunately, she could only score 12 coming in, but the overall score of 28 was going to prove a difficult challenge to the men who were still some way behind.

Jill getting one of her 11 1 pointers today

Despite channelling his inner Gary Player by dressing in all black, Robert was still being frustrated by his tee-shots. However, some great recoveries and excellent putting kept him in the hunt. Two perfect 4-woods got him to the back of the 13^th green and, two putts later, he had his second and last 3-pointer of the day.

Robert gets out the bunker on the 10th for a point

Vince also made a 3-point bogey on the same hole but, sadly, this was to be his only success on the back-nine. The headwind and a sore back were taking its toll and, with only 2 points in the last four holes, he finished with 11 points and 23 overall. 

Vince sensibly duffed his approach to 10 to leave him in a good position to secure his 2pts

Andrew was driving well but the rest of the game needed improvement. His only highlight on the back nine came on the par-3 14^th hole but, alas, the birdie putt just slid past, as many had for him in this round, and a disappointing 11 points left him on 26 for the day. 

Andrew putting on 10th but sadly not on the traditional green area saved for these shots

Robert was unfortunate to lose his ball on the par-5 15^th hole, but a strong finish on the last three holes helped him to another 14 points, and he was the only player to not score less on the back nine, finishing on 28 overall.

All of this meant that, on a low-scoring day, Chris and Robert (new winners again) shared first place.

Chris on her way to her first win of the season albeit a joint one

With Andrew in third and extending his lead in the overall championship. Jill and Vince tied for fourth, sadly leaving Jo without any reward for a hard day’s work. The results meant that Kevin, currently in second place overall, had lost little ground and was still in the hunt for the title. Following a review of the speed of play, it was clear that the men finished about a hole and a half behind the ladies, equating to about 400 yards. However, bearing in mind that the ladies’ course was some 367 yards shorter than the men’s, this was only to be expected.

The Tour moves on to the final event at Sheringham next month where, it is rumoured, 11 players have entered. The new WHS rules will be in place, so everyone will be curious to see what unfair handicap they have been allocated and what inflated one everyone else has been given! The championship trophy is almost in Andrew’s hands but, with big-money prizes available at the last event, several are lining up behind to trample over him should he stumble.

RNSG Autumn Tour – Woodbridge Wanderers – 30 September 2020

An orderly, gang of 9 turned up to play in pleasingly symmetrical 3 x 3 balls at an excellently presented course in great settings, warmish weather with a fair breeze blowing and a big threat of rain on the last 9 holes.

For once the ladies and men played off the same stroke allowances showing that the Equal Handicap Allowances Matter campaign is finally gaining traction.

That tidy order belied the confusion a certain Mr Spanner had caused by leaving the address of Purdis Heath in the diary booking. Poor Greg and Vince who had put that post code in their sat navs, had set off in good time but realised close to Purdis Heath, or at it, that travel plans were amiss. Their subsequent mad dash to the right venue caused Greg to miss a lunch stop, and Vince dropped back to the re-organised last grouping to give him more time.  Nice to have you with us in spirit if not in actual presence Bob.

With pre-drawn pairs John Butler (returning from England over 80s winter hockey training) was included in the Barnard family bubble, Greg Gladwell was welcomed into Andrew and Jill Gooch’s family group. Vince became an honorary Frazer and joined up with Chris and Kevin to reminisce about IT in the 1980s, camper van tours, and days gone by when they all used to score 40 point hauls.

Time for the regular fashion report, well Robert Barnard wins this week’s best groomed player award with a smart blue and grey theme. That extra time on the hair-do was well worth it!  Andrew and Greg co-ordinated excellently in beige trousers and sports tops – it’s what the mature man is into this autumn, and it’s always handy for the mud stains to be the same colour as the trousers.

The miscommunication that had plagued Vince and Greg had clearly impacted the ladies dress sense too. Although playing the Woodbridge Golf Course there was no bridge, and no river – so why Jo, Jill and Chris all end up playing in life-jackets is unknown. Rumours that their diary bookings showed that we were playing a seaside course are being investigated.

Jo, Robert and John teed off first and in a tight first 9 tussle Jo won by a whisker (Jo you must get those seen to) with 17 points to the guys 16.

John gets things underway while Robert looks on in his smart golfing gear

Second group away saw Andrew find the course to his liking with a stylish 20 points. Greg having popped some anti-migraine pills on the second tee was not as co-ordinated in his golf as he was in his dress sense and limped to 14 points, just pipping Jill’s 13 points. 2 blobs each did for their chances of outright success.

Andrew and Greg discuss their disappointment on not winning the best dressed golfer prize

Following behind the re-emerging Vince struggled to a meagre 10 points with far too many blobs.

Vince on his way to his first blob of the day

Chris managed a steady 14 points and Kevin found some fine form with 18 points to be in a mid-way 2^nd place.

Chris nearly sunk this putt on the 3rd for what would have been a birdied but later on chipped in on the 16th for the only 4 pointer today

So onto the back 9 as the storm clouds gathered and the wind picked up, and the lifejackets were duly pumped. Jo and John stuttered with 14 and 13 points dropping them out of the mix on 31 and 29 points respectively. 

Jo emerges from the undergrowth after an unsuccessful search for the ball

Robert however buoyed by his best-groomed player award (note Robert was buoyed without a lifejacket) walked tall and proud for 17 points and a very acceptable 33 points total. Worthy of a place perhaps?

Greg got off to a poor start with 1 point in the first 2 holes and with waning interest and a sub-standard putter just avoided the wooden spoon with a poor 12 points and 26 in total. 

Jill found some form, as you would expect from the newly crowned Bawburgh Ladies Net and Gross Club Champion, and with 16 points could hold her head high (and well above water), totalling 29 points all together.

The last group also found the back 9 tougher, or is it really that we are all just a load of old gits that get tired far too easily nowadays? Vince reduced his blob quota so upped his game to a respectable 14 points, but won a really lovely spoon for the trophy cabinet. Chris got to the same 14 point total but by a different route, including the only 4 pointer of the day with a birdie on a par 5.

Chris suggests both her playing partners take provisionals on the 11th despite their original balls eventually being found on the edge of the fairway

That left “Long Covid” Kev to battle Silver Fox Andrew and Style Guru Robert for top honours. Things were looking good for Kevin until a blob on stroke index 17 pulled him back to equal 2^nd on 33 points with Robert leaving Andrew to take the crown and the winners pot for the day.

This was the last known sighting of Kevin's shiny green ball as it was never seen again after toeing it over the trees

The rain started as we were in the car park, so we were all grateful for a speedy 3 hours 40 minutes round that kept us dry. With the right postcodes in the sat navs everyone at least got home safely and quickly.

Although the temperature is falling things are hotting up in the Race to Sheringham, for The Autumn C19 Challenge Champion. It’s the biggie in UK golf right now and with not much sport going on in the UK there’s the possibility of a potential place on BBCs Sports Personality of the Year up for grabs and David Attenborough’s Instagram follower record is under threat.

Watch out for the next update as the tour swings back to the coast for the Hunstanton Sands of Glory Shield. (For the avoidance of doubt that is at PE36 6JQ). 

Autumn tour round 3 at Kings Lynn

Low Scoring Classic

For the third instalment of the Autumn Tour, eight players headed west to one of the county’s favourite courses, King’s Lynn. With Tim, winner of the last event at Royal Cromer and joint money-list leader, unavailable, this looked to be the perfect opportunity for Kevin to put some distance between himself and the chasing pack. A shortened season means every penny is worth …… well, about a penny …. in the chase for the title.

The day got off to an unexpected start when the pre-tournament press conference was cancelled due to this week’s press officer being unavoidably delayed. He did have the opportunity to interview Jill in the car on the journey to the course, but both were distracted by Pop-Master on Radio 2!

Under bright blue skies, and with the course in perfect condition, the first group of Robert, Vince, Chris and Jo set off. 

First group enthusiastically gather at start of rouns

Perhaps it was the calm weather that confused them, but the front 9 proved to be difficult. Jo was the most consistent, scoring on every hole for 15 points, mainly thanks to her only par (and 3 pointer) coming on the 9^th. Chris was similar, only parring the 8^th hole but, due to a blob on short par-3 5^th, scored 13.

Jo prepares to hit another straight drive

Robert, meanwhile, was doing his best to avoid the dangerous sunshine and remained in the trees for much of the round. He did venture out on the 1^st and 9^th holes, helping him to 11 points. 

Robert about to visit the woods again

Vince, on the other hand, saw no reason to come out into the sunshine unless it was really worth it, scoring 3 points on the 4^th and 8^th; for 6 of the other 7 holes, he felt it best to remain under cover and made the turn with just 7 points.

Vince looks on in despair as another ball misses the fairway and rough 

The second group of Andrew, Kevin, Bob and Jill all avoided the first fairway, but good recoveries from Jill and Andrew saw them make a 5 and 4 respectively. Bob, who has been having some more lessons, found it difficult to put all what has been taught into practice, failing to score on the first 3 holes. Some improvement was found for the rest of the front 9, but he struggled to just 8 points; he was excited at the end when he realised it wasn’t the lowest score of the day at that stage. 

Jill prepares to tee off whilst Bobs provisional nestles by the side of the ladies tee (and it was one of his longest drives over the opening holes)

Jill, maybe suffering from the lengthy walk to some of the ladies’ tees, was also finding it difficult to locate her swing and reached just 12 at the turn.

Kevin, who’s driving had recently been the strength of his game, seemed to have reverted to the old motto of “hit it hard and play it where you find it”! Unfortunately, some of the places he found it where not very playable and, on some holes, the lovely green colour of the ball made it impossible to find it in the …. well, green countryside! He did, however, manage to score 13 despite the 3 blobs in a row on 3, 4 and 5. 

This is the last sighting of this ball as Kevin thins it into a nettle patch

Andrew was going for consistency, not a term usually associated with his golf. Some straight driving – always helpful at King’s Lynn – and six 4’s in the first 7 holes saw him reach the turn with 17 points and in first place.

Andrew misses his birdie putt but still got his 2nd of 6 4's in the opening 7 holes.

Having understood that the sun was supposed to shine, and that the light winds were okay for golf, the back nine was an improvement for most players. Robert obviously didn’t believe this and remained safely in the trees while scoring just 10 points for a total of 21. 

Robert demonstrates to Vince how to escape from the trees

Vince saw the light – quite literally – and scored a respectable 14 on the back 9 for an overall 21; however, his 8 blobs for the round did have the statisticians reaching for the record books but, fortunately for Vince, there have been worse.

Vince excitingly prepares to play his approach shot as it wasn't actually in the trees

Chris and Jo decided that it was time to show everyone how to play golf. In a remarkable display of consistency, Chris scored 2 points on every hole on the back 9 for a total of 31 and 3^rd place.

Chris on her way to another back 9 two pointer

Jo’s day just got better and better as she ensured a blob-free round. Four more 3 pointers on the back 9 helped her to a fabulous 21 and a clubhouse leading total of 36. In the post-round interview, she put much of her success down to the chipping lesson that she and Robert had attended; Robert was not convinced that he’d been at the same lesson!

Jo on her way to a commanding lead

The second group had mixed fortunes. Bob’s game seemed to have improved when he hit an excellent tee-shot into the par-3 12^th and scored his first 3 pointer of the day. However, this was a false dawn and only 6 other points meant that Bob’s total of 17 would be last on the day. 

Bob misses his birdie putt after an excellent shot to the 12th green

Jill’s game was still hiding from her but, as the round progressed, there were glimpses that it was returning. She found points hard to come by and another 12 gave her 24 overall; amazingly, as was announced at the prize ceremony afterwards, this gave her 5^th place and 50p! 

Kevin and Andrew were having their own back 9 battle, both keeping the ball in play and staying blob-free. Despite the improvement in direction, Kevin’s 15 points was only enough for a total of 28 and 4^th place. Andrew had glory in his sights and, after 14 holes was only 1 over handicap. But he visited 3 bunkers on 15 and 16 for a point on each, and the trees on 18. His 15 points left him on 32 overall. 

Andrew prepares to play first of the 3 players to all find the same greenside bunker

So, it was Jo’s day and the third different winner of the season. Her £7.00 first prize saw her leap to the top of the prize money table just ahead of Kevin but, with 3 events remaining, anyone can still win the coveted title. Woodbridge is the next venue and all players were excited by this, mainly due to there being less trees!

 As the players enjoyed drinks on the terrace, the benefit of golf lessons and the glorious weather were the main talking points during the after-round press conference. With the sun shining brightly down the 18^th hole, and with the fairways in such good condition, many were left wondering why they had spent so much time in the shade; perhaps avoiding the trees should be the subject of the next lesson!

 RNSG Autumn Tour – Wednesday 2^nd September2020 – Royal Cromer

As the dreadful Bank Holiday weather cleared into autumn sunshine and a light breeze 8 good folk met at Cromer for round 2 of the one-off Autumn Tour.

Mike reminding everyone how he used to caddy for his Granddad in 1908 (or something like that)

Jo and Robert Barnard were grouped with Tim Simms and Bob Spanner, followed by Chris and Kevin Frazer with Greg Gladwell and Mike Hammond.

Tim gets proceedings underway

Vince has yet to bring his 20% reduced handicap to the RNSG tour and was sadly missed. The Gooch clan were testing themselves further afield, feeling the allure of Premiership level competition on the national Mixed Pairs circuit preferable to the cut and thrust of Championship level RNSG golf.

Political matters were dealt with early on. No competitors opted to take “the knee” at the start due to some confusion over the Black Wives Natter campaign. No migrants were noted off the coast.  No campaigners were present on the course.

In the pre-match fitness bulletins Greg reported back twinges, Chris limped with blisters, Kevin reported he was now around 80% of his ultra athlete fitness levels. Sandy had run so fast the G force had ripped tendons from muscles and she was out of action. Bob and Tim both passed imaginary random drug tests.

Excellent clothing selections were noted from the well co-ordinated Robert, Jo, Greg and Tim in blue, and Chris in mauve. Bob and Kevin went for the Tiger Woods type final round red shirts. Mike without Sandy’s advice dressed himself and had an interesting beige and lime green combo going on. No golf major has ever been one by a beige and lime combo player apparently, the chances of that ever happening seem remote. 

Mike in his lime green kit

The course was in a good condition with a fair bit of green grass on display for a change. The sanded greens made short game skills a little more tricky to master. It is always good to find one reason to blame conditions for poor play I find!

Greg missing his putt on the tricky greens

Tim was fast out of the traps with 3 x 3 pointers in the first 4 holes, confidence buoyed by his decision to forego shorts in case a rogue shower should strike. He kept it steady for a front 9 of 16 points. The rest of his group took on the challenge of looking for the lost ball as many times as they could and with 9, 10 and 11 points their goose was cooked somewhat too early for Xmas, but early enough for a few baguettes to be filled back at Glen Lodge.

Group 1 finishing their front 9

The second group were more consistent. Chris had a creditable 18 points with a blob. Greg, only participating after a 7.30 am C19 all clear decision, had off the tee woes and scrambled to 15. Kevin 14 with his normal driving display of great and grate, and steady Eddie Mike ,16 points, were in close attendance.

Kevin hitting one of his good drives on the 4th

On the homeward 9 the course pace slowed down. However, Tim continued to rack up the points playing well and headed into the last hole 1 over handicap on 33 points. Robert found 4 good holes for 13 points, and 5 mediocre ones for 6 more to have a very respectable 19 on the way home.  Robert’s total of 30 points was enough for a podium finish.

 Bob, current Cromer record holder, had sadly left his A game at home, as well as his B and C games. It was really a D level performance from Bob but to be consistent the government upgraded him to a C just for today and then got criticised for it. Jo was the bookies favourite before tee off but downgraded her playing too, scoring 8 points as well to give Bob some support.

Consolation for Bob has he made it on to the lowest RNSG scores record list in equal 3rd place. 

Close behind the last group hit a moment of shame on the Stroke Index 16 12^th hole with every one achieving nil points.  As both Mike and Kevin went up and down the slope in front of the green the You’ve Been Framed team filled their content boots. Enthusiasm dipped for the male contingent but Chris had the mental fortitude to hold it together and recovered well so she also limped down the last on 33 points and festering blisters.

Chris tees off on the back 9 at the start of her challenge for the title

Kevin tried to rally waning interest by relaying scoreboard updates as the he Greg and Mike came to the last… and then wished he hadn’t as Greg and Mike surged past him. Greg who had finally found his game on the last 4 holes, and Mike, who had been a caddy at Cromer when Noah was a boy, tied on 29 points. 3 blobs and 4 blobs respectively had curtailed Greg and Mike’s aspirations.

Two missed short putts from Kevin cost him the chance of any prize money today

And so it came to pass, that Chris and Tim would battle it out down the last hole (without being aware of it). Two titans of the RNSG tour, legends in their own families, each with a trophy cabinet full of empty shelves, set off with great hope in their hearts.

Decent drives from each made it 15 all as the commentators confused their sports.

Tim using all those many, many, many years of experience, reached the green in 2. Chris found the front bunker for 2. 30- 15 to Tim.

Chris then played a smart shot to 10 feet.  30 all.

Chris drained that putt into the hole dreaming of her first outright individual win since June 2018, leapt like a salmon and simultaneously punched the air. 40 – 30 to Chris.

Chris putting during an exciting battle with Tim on the back 9

Tim steadied himself, focused, and launched his 30 foot long putt towards the hole. Chris prayed for rain. The crowd, featuring a couple of bees and a grasshopper stayed behind the ropes, gasped as Tim made a complete mockery of tennis scoring in golf.  Tim nailed it for a birdie and took the win by a single point. Cometh the hour, cometh the Tim.

“Bravo” shouted the grass hopper. “Zzzzzzz” murmured the bees. Tim turned, smiled and strode off for the TV interview which you can download from Friday night. Onwards to Purdis for round 3.