RNSG Round 6. The Open at Thorpeness

RNSG – BRITISH OPEN – THURSDAY 15 JULY 2021 – THORPENESS – THE WAR ON THE SHORE

The final major of the year was expected to draw a strong field of entrants at this popular and testing venue. With 3 unique winners of the previous events it was all to play for. There was a large gathering of around 50 members of the public down in the village eager in anticipation of the days events. Alas with only 5 players appearing public interest was lost and they went off for walks, boating on the lake, and coffee in the café.

The lack of participants was particularly disappointing, as we know nothing is more important than the final RNSG major of the year. The BBC web site showed only a 3% likelihood of rain but clearly this was off-putting. To be fair Jill withdrew at the last minute due to waking up with a pain. Andrew has his flaws but that seemed harsh. We think Andrew had a good day on the sofa watching the lesser British Open on TV though. John was waiting by the phone for that late Olympic hockey team call up. Tim was golfed out after clocking up many rounds of late.

The pre-round eats got off to a bizarre start – Greg ordered “a simple sandwich, something plain like ham on brown bread” and was actually literally delivered a slice of brown bread, no butter with ham on! That was a much better outcome than the after round eats – a 25 minute wait due to a “printer error in the kitchen” for a scone to be “prepared” seemed to suggest a degree of technology sophistication not normally associated with putting a scone and butter on a plate. 

At the start every one declared their hand – Christine had been showing more form than Shergar  - before he was stolen. Kevin proclaimed his 35 points on the Old Course and 41 points on the Jubilee, and along with his impressive Woodhall Spa logo’d shirt hopes were high for the current course record holder. Bob had turned up in Tiger uniform with his red shirt promising a strong ending. As you will see later Bob indeed did create history with a record breaking last 5 holes. Tracey was just pleased to be along as an irregular player, and we were all pleased to catch up with her too. Greg was in his 5^th week of a dizziness illness, and 13^th consecutive day without a break from feeling giddy and was pleased just to have made the drive there with only 6 motorists honking him. His hopes were low.

The randomizer went into action and Kevin treated us to sound effects too for a change. Greg couldn’t recall actually pressing any buttons on the app but somehow ended up with the Frazer clan. Bob and Tracey having driven down together, were stuck together on the way home. too When they were paired together Bob smiled pleasantly, through gritted teeth and rolled his eyes. Tracey smiled pleasantly and muttered something which sounded like “unpaid carer duties”.

Bob gets the Open underway

Bob and Tracey shot off in the front of the field. Bob had 9 points after 4 holes, Tracey 6 points. Their progress halted on the 5^th tee as Bob told Tracey to wait as they had caught up the group in front who were on tee. After a few minutes waiting behind bushes keeping out of the way it was clear there had never been a group there at all. Tracey smiled pleasantly and muttered something which sounded like “unpaid carer duties”.

Back in the 3 ball group Greg adopted the approach of not falling over with his balance challenges and played within himself to keep the ball in play albeit with a few tops on the way. 3 woods off the tee, safe approach shots just short of the green, and the hope of chipping and putting to pick up an odd par were the order of the day. He had 6 points after 4 holes. Kevin adopted the approach of taking 3 rescue off the tee too, but safety is not a favoured club in his bag and business as usual was resumed as he blobbed 2 of the first 3 holes. Chis tried to make Kevin feel less bad by matching his blob regime. The choice of returning to the pro shop for a Frazer family ball top up was declined, although one kindly dog walker had found 3 balls and later left them on the tee in an attempt to be helpful. The Frazers declined to use them – apparently they were of far less quality than the ones they kept hitting into bushes and losing. For some reason the Frazers also prefer the yellow and green grass coloured camouflage balls and remain surprised when they cant be found. Hmmm.

Kevin hits his shining grass coloured ball into the long grass, again. Ho Hum

Greg kept plugging away and managed to score on every hole and mustered 15 points at half way. A few times Chris bailed Greg out with lucky ball finds when a lost ball looked more likely. Kevin’s pleasure at Chris’ help to Greg was hard to detect and he didn’t share the joy. The quality of play in that group of 3 was so poor that there was a competition to find lost balls taking place which seemed to be more interesting than the golf. Kevin had his normal feast or famine round threatening the all time blob record with 5 on the front 9 but managing 10 points on the 4 counting holes. Chris was steadily mediocre managing 11 points.

Greg keeps his balance as he sinks another putt

At the front of the field Tracey had put a run of 14 points together in 6 holes but only added one more for 15 at half way, one in front Bob who had tailed off with only 5 points in the last 5 holes.

Tracey in front 9 action

So onto the 2^nd 9. The Frazers traded long putts. Kevin from 20 foot, Chris from 15, Kevin from 25 feet which stopped on the lip of the hole for 8 seconds before giving itself up. Kevin then did a full 360 lip out from 20 feet which drew a consolation “bad luck” from Greg. Chris laughed far too loudly, and far too lengthily for it to be comfortable.

Chris in putting action

A bizarre incident midway through the 2^nd 9 was the finding of an unbroken hens egg in a bunker – complete with supermarket use by date.  The kind of mystery that is up there with Bigfoot, aliens and who abducted Mike and Sandie Hammond?, which will no doubt be the subject of a documentary.

Kevin found some form, just one more blob to keep him off the all time worst blob leaderboard  of 8 blobs and a fine homeward 18 points to get to 28 overall. Chris with 3x 3 pointers and a great birdie 3 for 4 points also had 18 points making 29 overall to take family honours. Greg kept plugging away using his driver only twice in the round, keeping to the boring but safe method. Despite a run of 1 pointers there were also a few more 3 pointers and he came to the last on 28 points – nervously close to both Kevin and Chris.

Greg was just pleased to find his ball (again, not that Kevin was bitter) as he selected his next weapon

Back at the front, if that makes sense, Bob had 9 points in the first 4 holes of the back 9, but then went into chipping and putting meltdown to blob 5 successive holes and tie Kevin on 6 blobs overall. No one has ever finished that badly we believe, although when Greg had to walk off with a bad back once and didn’t play the last 5 holes he didn’t score either. With just the 9 points on the back 9 Bob’s 23 point total won the “bottom trumps” prize. Tracey smiled pleasantly and muttered something like “unpaid carer”.

I think this pretty much sums up Bobs last 5 holes

Tracey herself played some nice back 9 golf. Helped by a 4 pointer to offset one blob she had 14 points coming to the last, which made for 29 points in total. So with Chris having 29 in the clubhouse, Kevin with 28 in the clubhouse, Tracey on 29 with one to play and Greg with 28 and one to play – it was nervy tense stuff. Padraig was due to drop by to see who had the steel to play well under such pressure and make the late call up to the Ryder Cup team, but remained hidden and no doubt observing in the bushes.

Tracey lost her first ball but somehow made a second ball net par for 2 points to get to 31 overall. Greg’s 3 wood method had let him down off the tee with a scaggy looking  150 yard semi duff. He followed it up with a safe 7 iron just short of the cross bunkers at 100 yards and a punched 9 iron pitch and run that looked perfect but ran through the green. With Bob, Tracey and a squirrel in a tree looking on Greg’s chip-back sand wedge nestled in the hole for a 3 pointer to tie Tracey on 31 points. Greg punched the air - before a mini giddy attack left him wishing he hadn’t.

Greg chips in on the last. (Yes actually a photo that matches the text!)

Countback showed identical 15 point / 16 point splits for Greg and Tracey, but Greg’s last 6 hole score of 12 points was enough to win. As it turned out with Tracey being an associate member (not paid the £20 tour card fee) she was not eligible for prizes but none-the-less it was a good effort and we may see more of Tracey in the weeks ahead.

 With a pair of major wins this year Greg moves up the leader board in the prize money, and with his safety approach first creating a blob free round that was helpful too. Chris and Kevin made good eclectic progress

So…  we roll on to the business end of the tour with some great venues ahead. Next up is Purdis Heath on Tuesday 3^rd August for the Olympics and another double prize money opportunity. Look forward to seeing you all there.